Author: SusannahDB

It’s Okay to Cry

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It’s Okay to Cry
In my work as a hospice chaplain, I have the privilege to spend time with a variety of people. I learn from them. As I was sitting with a man who is reflecting on his life as his death nears, I asked him about his life. He shared-
God is good.
Time goes by so fast.
And I wonder if I always remembered to tell my people I love them.
Those are three good lessons to ponder and live.
And here is a fourth. I was sitting with a woman who has dementia and whose husband is dying. She has difficulty finding the words she wants to say. She is aware of the changes she is seeing in her spouse of many, many years. And as I was talking with her she began to cry. I said, “It’s okay to cry”, and she repeated the phrase over and over.
So today I hope you find strength, peace, and hope in the words of our elders who are nearing the end of their journey. I hope you’ll read these words and share them with others who need to hear them.
God is good.
Time goes by so fast.
And I wonder if I always remembered to tell my people I love them.
It’s okay to cry.

Bread for All!

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Today’s Gospel lesson begins this way, “Jesus said to them, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.” -John 6:35. When I hear these words or gather around the communion table with a community of believers, I remember a story. One Sunday morning I was serving communion by intinction (each person gets a piece of bread or cracker and dips it into a cup of juice or wine). I love serving communion this way in my own community because I can call each person by name and remind them that this meal is for each and every one of them. A father and son came up to me and did not take bread and had nothing to dip in my cup. Thinking they were a little confused by the process I started to encourage them to get some bread for dipping. The Dad said to me in a very quiet voice, “We cannot take communion, so we come up and pretend. We cannot have gluten.” These words broke my heart. I continued to serve communion to the rest of the people in line, and yet I couldn’t get his words out of my mind. This table (Jesus’ table) is a place where no one should need to pretend. Each person is invited to come as they are and know they are loved. And we were not able to welcome these two.

Immediately after worship, I began an important conversation with people able to make the necessary changes. Conversations about the best way to move forward occurred. And it was decided that we should not single out those who need gluten-free bread, we would only offer gluten-free bread. It was not a smooth and easy process, and yet it was the right thing to do. I am thankful that after this change when I stood at the table and invited all to come forward I knew I meant it. No one would need to pretend.

This story reminds me that I need to look for roadblocks that I am causing others. I need to mean what I say. I need to accept people as they are and where they are. I need to remember when Jesus says, “I am the bread of life”, it means bread that all can eat and enjoy.

Hosea 10:12 Calling Us to Worship and Sending Us out to Serve

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Sow for yourselves righteousness;
Reap steadfast love;
Break up your fallow ground;
For it is time to seek the Lord, that he may come and rain righteousness upon you. -Hosea 10:12

Hosea appears four times in the lectionary. The verse I am referencing today does not appear in the lectionary. That means you could attend church every Sunday for three years and never hear this verse. This verse is just one example of why some pastors decide to go off lectionary and explore stories and verses that are seldom heard.

Hosea (like all the prophets) is not an easy book to read. Hosea speaks to the people who have been unfaithful to God. When I read this book, the verse I kept coming back to was Hosea 10:12. Maybe it is because I grew up in farming communities and have relatives who farmed. Maybe it was the action verbs calling me into service. I read this verse over and over and over. And I pondered how to use it and how to share it.

This verse would make a perfect call to worship or benediction as it challenges us to examine how we are living and return to God. It would be a great discussion verse for a Sunday School class of any age or youth group night. It would be a great verse to read while breaking ground at a community garden. For self or group reflection, you might turn the verses into questions-Where can I sow righteousness? How can I reap steadfast love? What fallow ground do I need to break up? How, when, where, and why is it time for me to seek the Lord?

I encourage you to spend some time with these words and see how they can influence you.

 

Psalm 24 Benediction

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A benediction as the week draws to an end.

In a world that feels divided, let us remember, friends, that “The earth is the Lord’s and all that is in it, the world, and those who live in it” (Psalm 24:1). This is a reminder that God loves each and every person here on Earth. God loves this planet we call home. God loves the animals, the rivers, the lakes, the mountains, the deserts. God created this planet and called it good. So, as you go out into God’s world, go knowing you belong to the One who created all you see. Go knowing God loves you and wants you to enjoy this beautiful world where you live. Amen.

 

Go in Peace Knowing You Are Loved

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This week as I was writing this benediction I was searching for a feeling of peace. I was longing for that peace that passes all understanding to be with me in my life. So, as you read this, know this benediction is for you and for me.
To set the mood for this benediction, I suggest having the piano played softly. Something soothing and not too familiar. Let the music play for 30 seconds to a minute to bring a sense of calm.
Friends, the time has come for us to leave this place. Here we have sought sanctuary. Here we have heard God’s good news. Here we have been reminded we are loved. Hold those things in your hearts as you move out into the world. When you leave this place, be sanctuary for those who need a safe place to be. When you leave this place, live the good news with your actions and your attitude. When you leave this place, love God, your neighbor, and yourself. Know you are God’s beloved and go in God’s own peace. Amen.

Alaska Wild Teas Raspberry Tea

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A year ago, I was enjoying a journey through Alaska with my family. It was a wonderful week exploring beautiful places, relaxing, eating delicious food, and spending quality time with my family. One of my souvenirs to remind me of the trip was this delicious tea. Since I love all things raspberry, I thought a raspberry herbal tea would be the perfect way to remember my time in Alaska. So to remember the trip, I enjoyed a cup of this tea this week.
This raspberry tea is a smooth, easy to drink tea with a subtle taste of raspberry. It is delicious and not too full of raspberry flavor. It pairs well with See’s Dark Chocolate Balls (a favorite treat of mine). It does appear that you can order this tea online if a trip to Alaska is not in your future. I’m planning to enjoy this tea as my evening summer beverage as I remember a great trip.

Here, I Pause!

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Here I pause in my sojourning
giving thanks for having come
come to trust at every turning
God will guide me safely home. 
 
–Come, O Fount of Every Blessing, 459 New Century Hymnal
 
In church, we sang these words, and they stayed with me. It is easy to not go to church-as one who used to work in the church and now does not-I have a much better understanding of how many others things pull at our attention. So as I was sitting in church singing these words, I felt like they were written for me. Coming into the church calms me. It feels like a pause and change from my daily life. In worship (especially when I am not leading worship), I am calmed. I breathe deeply. I feel connected.
I do give thanks for being in God’s house. I give thanks for being welcomed, for familiarity and comfort and for being challenged. I give thanks for God’s never-ending love for each of us. And I am reminded that God “will guide me safely home”.
Loving God, Today we hear your voice in song. We know that you want to spend time with us. We know your want us to live out our faith. We know you want us to slow down and look for you. Help us to do these things and help us to practice gratitude because when we stop to count our blessings it changes us too. Thank you, Holy One. Amen.

Always Say Thank You

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After a rough week, I thought a glass of wine with dinner would taste good. When I went to the fridge in our garage to take out a bottle of wine, imagine my surprise when the first bottle I grabbed was half empty. I have no idea when this bottle was opened and my best guess is at least three months ago. So, I went on to bottle number two. (And don’t worry I did bring the half empty bottle into the house to empty and recycle). Now back to the full bottle of wine. I looked at it and thought it was a screw top wine, so I tried to twist it open and nothing happened. Now, I could have asked someone else in the house for help opening the wine. Instead I thought maybe it actually has a cork in it, so I got out the cork screw and tried to open it. I tried three times to open the screw top wine bottle with a cork screw. Finally, my husband saw what I was doing and opened he wine using the screw top. And because this story wasn’t funny enough the wine was not good. It tasted terrible. After all that, I had two sips of it. Of course the second sip was to make sure it was terrible, and it was.

I share this story to acknowledge that we all make mistakes, second guess ourselves, and try to solve problems in ways we know won’t work. When life is more challenging, it is difficult to be at our best, thinking creativity and finding solutions before problems exist. My prayer for myself and for all of you is that we can be kind to ourselves, take time to take care of ourselves when we are too tired, too worn out, too overwhelmed, too burdened.
Compassionate One,
Life can be hard and life is beautiful. You walk with us on easy days and hard days. You are with us when we are at the top of our game and when we’d prefer to crawl back under the covers. You are our constant support and giver of all good gifts. For days when nothing goes as planned, we ask your help in doing our best, keeping our sense of humor, and knowing that tomorrow is another day. For perfect days where everything goes as planned, remind us to still give thanks. Thank you, God for the gift of life and every other way you shower us with your blessings. We say thank you, thank you, thank you. Amen.

A Man Called Ove-Book Review

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A Man Called Ove
Fredrik Backman
So often a big part of my job at hospice is helping people realize their purpose and set goals. When someone can no longer work or possibly leave their home, they might feel useless and a burden to family and friends. By listening and encouraging them to share their story, a new purpose for living can be found and new goals can give life added meaning.
Ove is a man who feels like his life has no meaning. And on the surface, Ove is easy to dislike. He is a grumpy man who wants to be left alone. Everything in his life must be just so and when we meet him things are not right in his life, and he cannot imagine they will/can ever be right again. I hope you’ll join Ove on his journey through grief, finding a new purpose (even if he doesn’t want one), and love. It is a two tissue book. (My Mom and I agree on that).
“One finds a way of living for the sake of someone else’s future. And it wasn’t as if Ove also died when Sonja left him. He just stopped living. Grief is a strange thing” (326).
Warning-due to the themes in this book, if you are actively grieving the death of a loved one, this may not be the right book for you at this time. Instead I would recommend The Curious Charms of Arthur Pepper which also explores themes of grief only in a more lighthearted way.

A Thank You to Up with People

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A Thank You to Up with People
Last Fall my husband and I traveled 5 hours to see an Up with People (UWP) show. It had been 11 years since our last show. If you are not familiar with UWP, it is a fantastic organization that has spent the last 50 years asking us to see each other as human beings, to work together for change, and to spread a message of hope and peace.
I first saw UWP in Sharon, Pennsylvania at a show with my grandparents when I was young. I remember loving the show and leaving singing the theme song with my sister. In 2006, I hosted a staff member and a cast member when they came to Wisconsin.
As I was enjoying the most recent show, I realized I need to thank UWP. Without UWP, I may never have met my husband. I married an Uppie (an UWP alum). He traveled across the United States, Canada, Norway, and Japan with UWP. My California born and raised husband moved to Wisconsin to attend college because of UWP. And we met in that Wisconsin town. So, I’d like to thank UWP for the ways it changed and shaped my husband’s life and mine. And thank you UWP for letting me marry into the family.
If UWP is in your neck of the woods, see a show or better yet become a host family. (When former cast mates get together, they always remember and share stories about host families).
If more people were for people
All people, everywhere
There’d be a lot less people to worry about
And a lot more people who care.
More than 50 years later and the theme song is still challenging us and calling us to work for hope and peace in our part of the world! Thank you Up with People!