Each day, I look for joy. Where is the joy in your day? Even on hard days, sad days, long days, rainy days, there may be joy if you keep your senses open for joy.
Too often, I think we want joy to be big and noteworthy. Waiting for big joy can cause us to overlook the small moments of joy that exist even when things are hard.
This week my Mom asked me to make her favorite Rice Krispy treats. She has been making this recipe since I was a kid. You boil one cup of Karo syrup with one cup of white sugar. When that is boiling, shut off the stove and add in one cup of peanut butter. Stir it up and then add in six cups of Rice Krispies. Dump the whole mixture into a greased 9×13 pan. Enjoy! In the midst of a hard week, we enjoyed a favorite treat.
For me, searching for the joy in each day helps me navigate the hard days. I know there is joy to be found in a laugh, a smile, a moment of calm, a walk around the block. Look for joy as a way to renew your spirit today.
Late in 2019, I was introduced to “1000 Hours Outside“. This is the encouragement to increase the amount of time spent outside to lessen the amount of time spent in front of screens/inside. It was created to encourage taking children outside more and evolved to include adults too. I jumped into this idea with both feet on January 1st. I began to track my time outside. I printed the countdown sheet where I could cross off every hour until I reached my goal of 1000 hours. You will not be shocked to know that I did not make big progress toward my goal in the cold, wet days of January. And for those of you who love math, 1000 hours averages about 2 hours and 45 minutes a day. This has been a long year, so you may not remember that January 2020 on the Eastern Shore of Maryland was not a month that inspired me to sit outside or hike outside or be outside.
My excitement for this project turned to disappointment and discouragement. And, I quit. I took my countdown worksheet and I crumpled it up because I was so defeated. I recycled it. That isn’t the end of the story. This idea of getting outside more-of intentially choosing to be outside-stayed with me. As 2020 unfolded in ways none of us dreamed possible, I had more opportunities to be outside. We are now being encouraged to eat outside and be outside more and more. What could be seen as a massive failure-I have no idea how many hours I spent outside this year because I stopped counting in January-could instead be seen as taking someone else’s idea and making it work for me. Because this idea has stayed with me, I find myself feeling pulled to be outside more to sit and watch the clouds, or walk through my neighborhood or the local park, or even to do yardwork not because I love yard work and instead because I love how good it looks when the work is done.
I hope my failed attempt to keep track of how many hours I spent outside this year inspires you to look at something in your life that could be considered a failure or an unfinished project or something you never started because it would never end and you make it work for you. Do it in your own way. Try it. Let the ideas of others in and use them in ways that work for you.
God of All Creation, We can be too hard on ourselves for those things we call failures. Help us to reframe our ideas as opportunities. Use our creativity to create new paths instead of obstacles. Push us outside of our comfort zones to places where we might change and grow. When we do go outside, open us to experience the wonder of creation. We give thanks to you, God, for being part of your creation and being your beloved children. Amen.
When was the last time you used your sense of wonder? When was the last time you stared in awe at an object and were amazed by it? When was the last time you watched something and wondered how does that work? How long has it been since you saw two or three or four things and thought if I put them together they will create something new? For some of us and unfortunately for probably many of us, the demands of life impinge on our time to develop our sense of wonder. Many children do not let anything get in the way of their time to create and explore. In fact, this is how my nephew earned his nickname, Crafty Sam. One rainy summer day when he was visiting, he saw one of his three favorite objects a cardboard box. He asked for his two other favorite things Scotch tape and a pair of scissors. He sat down on the floor and got to creating. What his Aunt sees as a pile needing to be recycled is for him a collection of cardboard waiting to be transformed by his imagination. So, I sat down beside him and asked how I could assist. He held up a box and said this is going to be a clothes hamper. And like too many of us adults do, I began to doubt. That box is too small to be a clothes hamper. I don’t need another clothes hamper. And, I pushed those questions down and instead asked him what clothes would go into this new clothes hamper. And Crafty Sam said, “Obviously, small clothes like socks and underwear because it is a small hamper.” I sat on the floor and took followed his directions for the pattern he saw in his head. I guess I did a good job because that day I earned the nickname, Crafty Suz. That small clothes hamper created with only part of a shoebox, a pair of scissors, lots of Scotch tape, and a sense of wonder sits on my dresser. I have learned that if I place a pair of dirty socks in it as requested by its creator then I forget to wash those socks. So for creativity to meet practiciality, it is now home to my socks without friends which you might call socks searching for their partners. What can we learn from Crafty Sam, other children, the more creative types among us? Cultivate your sense of wonder. For you, that might be creating something from ordinary objects like Crafty Sam. You might take all the leftovers in the fridge and create a new, and hopefully delicious, meal. You could take that box of memories and make a scrapbook. Another idea is going outside and listening. Close your eyes and hear the sounds around you and imagine what you aren’t seeing. Or stare up at the sky for awhile and watch the way it changes when we simply pay attention. Let yourself daydream using the what ifs from your life, and if in that time you discover something you want to change, change it. I recognize that after reading this you are returning to regular life which left me pondering how to conclude in a way that encourages a sense of wonder combined with the necessity to do what must be done this day, and so as I contemplated how to conclude this time I thought I should leave you with a three step plan of how to include wonder in your daily life. And then I realized (and not as quickly as I should have realized) that I was falling right back into my old routines with no room left for my sense of wonder. So, I am not going to tie this up in a box and a bow for you with all the answers and instead I’m going to encourage you today and in the coming days to cultivate your sense of wonder-by looking, listening, feeling, tasting, and smelling the ways you can explore and experience that which exists around you. Creative One, Life gets busy and we hurry and rush and keep our eyes trained on the next thing that must be done. Slow us down. Distract us with a bird or a flower or a cloud in the sky. We feel this need to be productive at all times. Slow us down to listen to another person, to read a book, write a letter, look at a picture. Slow us down and remind us to be and to breathe. Amen and Amen.
Crafty Suz assisting Crafty Sam in making a creation.
I shared this reflection this morning with a group of Coastal Hospice staff. I hope you find it as meaningful as they did.
As I was driving home from work last night, I sighed and said out loud to myself in the car, “I am tired.” And I paused to reflect on what type of tired I was feeling…was I good tired or bad tired?
Let me step back for a moment and explain. When I was a child, one of my favorite cassette tapes we listened to as a family was Harry Chapin’s Greatest Stories Live. My sister and I learned every word to every song on that tape. Harry Chapin’s best known song is Cats in the Cradle which he wrote and sang and many singers have covered that song throughout the years. To this day, he is my favorite singer and songwriter even though he died when I was young.
In addition to writing many, many songs some of his albums also include quotes like this one.
“My grandfather was a painter. He died at age eighty-eight, he illustrated Robert Frost’s first two books of poetry, and he was looking at me and he said, “Harry, there’s two kinds of tired. There’s good tired and there’s bad tired.” He said, “Ironically enough, bad tired can be a day that you won. But you won other people’s battles; you lived other people’s days, other people’s agendas, other people’s dreams. And when it’s all over, there was very little you in there. And when you hit the hay at night, somehow you toss and turn; you don’t settle easy. It’s that good tired, ironically enough, can be a day that you lost, but you don’t even have to tell yourself because you knew you foughtyour battles, you chased your dreams, you lived your days and when you hit the hay at night, you settle easy, you sleep the sleep of the just and you say ‘take me away’”.”
And as I reflected on this quote and my day, I realized I was good tired. I have a job where I can utilize my gifts and talents. And this is my hope for you. I hope the work you do leaves you good tired knowing that you as part of the hospice and palliative care team are working with people at a difficult time in their lives and you can make it a little less difficult. What I love about this work is being part of a large team—most of whom I do not know the intricacies of your jobs, and what I do know is that each one of us is needed to ensure that we can promote dignity and quality of life for patients and families who face life-limiting conditions.
My hope is that the next time you are feeling tired at the end of the day you take a moment to determine if you are good tired or bad tired. If you find yourself bad tired, please consider how you can put more of yourself into your day. We need you and the gifts you bring. The world needs you and the love you have to share. And if you determine you are good tired, give thanks for a good day, “settle easy and sleep the sleep of the just.”
Let us pray together-Holy One, Too often we find ourselves tired from work and life and responsibilities and so much more that fills our days. As you have made us all unique and full of different abilities, help us find ways to share ourselves with others so that at the end of day we can rest easy. Amen.
Recently I was talking with a friend about the beauty and wonder of creation. We wondered together whether birds and other wildlife have been more active since the pandemic began or whether we have simply become more attune to their presence? My answer was yes. As I type this and reflect on this conversation, I am sitting outside on my back deck listening to the cacophony of birds and insects that also call this area home. The sounds are loud and overwhelming and peaceful too. Are they louder than last year at this time or am I simply more aware of them? This pandemic has shifted my life and encouraged me to spend more time outside. While I am not thankful for the pandemic, I am thankful for the push outdoors. When I must work at home, I find it can often be done from outside and I am thankful to be part of God’s creation while keeping a distance from others. I hope you will find time to be outside soon. Sitting, moving, listening and looking at God’s amazing creation is a great reminder that we are part of creation with a responsibility to care for it and to enjoy it. So go outside and give thanks to God for this beautiful place we all call home.
My life has not been ordinary for the past few weeks. And I know we can all say that our lives have been less than ordinary for most of this year. This is a prayer for those days that are not ordinary.
Loving God, We need you today. Our plans have flown out the window as we are coping with the unexpected. It feels like we do not have an anchor and we are floating in the sea unable to see land. Rescue us! Anchor us! Bring us safely to shore. We wonder if our hopes will ever come to reality. God, guide us through this day with changing expectations. Guide us! Hold us! Love us! Remind us that nothing can separate us from your love for us! Nothing! So even when things are upside down and backwards, you are with us. While we wait for direction, be our gps turning us around when we start down the wrong road. The questions keep piling up, and we seek answers from you, O Wise One. Answer us in your time while giving us the patience to keep on waiting even when the wait seems so long. We long for the ordinary days to return, and until they do be with us, Loving God, every single day. Amen.
When I read Anne Lamott, I laugh and cry and nod my head in agreement. In this book, she shares her thoughts on a variety of topics. If you enjoy her writing, you will enjoy this book.
I laughed out loud when in her chapter on writing she said, “And everything that happened to you belongs to you. If people wanted you to write more warmly about them, they should have behaved better” (68).
Her writing draws on her life experiences and it draws me in with its truth telling. She writes about prayer, making life choices, end of life, and relationships.
“The lesson here is that there is no fix. There is, however, forgiveness. To forgive yourselves and others constantly is necessary. Not only is everyone screwed up, but everyone screws up” (50).
”…the more time you spend in the presence of death, the less you fear it. Your life will be greatly enhanced by spending time with dying people, even though you’ve been taught to avoid doing so” (77). I agree wholeheartedly!
”I wish good things lasted forever. That would work best for me. But God is a lot more subtle than I am comfortable with. Saint John wrote that God is Love, that anytime you experience kindness and generosity, hope, patience and caring, you are in the presence of God” (102).
“Hospice is the cavalry. Hospice means that death isn’t going to be nearly as bad as you think” (125). I am thankful when people agree with these words and trust Hospice to enter their homes and allow us to join in life beside you. I often say-we can’t make it easy. My hope is that we can make this time a little easier.
This book will not take you long to read, and then the words inside will stay with you. You may be challenged and changed and encouraged to see things in a new way. Give this book a read!
I would like to talk about fishing. Growing up, my grandparents would take my sister and I fishing in a pond on their farm. We would load up all the necessary supplies into the pickup truck and then set out driving a little ways on the road and then through the field until we came to the fishing pond. Everyone would get their five gallon bucket and fishing pole. And I also brought a book. I wanted to be back at the house reading and had to fish. So, I would cast my line into the pond, see that my bobber was steady, sit on my bucket, and pick up my book. Someone would yell my name when my bobber went under. I would sigh and set down my book so I could reel in a fish. As you can tell this was not an activity I enjoyed.
Recently, my husband thought we should start fishing. All of the trips to the fishing pond came back to mind. Reluctantly, I agreed to fish with him. And I cannot tell you how surprised I was to discover that I am enjoying it. I find it so relaxing to stand on the dock, casting into the water, and slowly reeling it in. I find myself breathing slower and can feel my body relaxing as I fish. I have been watching sunsets and birds flying overhead. Lest you think I am a true fisher person. I am still happiest when I do not catch anything and can just enjoy the rhythm and action of casting out and reeling it in over and over. So you can hear this reflection as an encouragement to try something again. Try something you didn’t enjoy and maybe this time you will. Disclaimer-you may still dislike the activity, and that is okay too! Or maybe you will hear this as a call to go outside and soak in the beauty of nature. Possibly, you are hearing a reminder to rest because God rested on the seventh day and your body needs rest too. Holy One, we give you thanks this day for memories and new experiences. We are grateful for sunsets and time in your creation. We ask for strength to do the work you have called us to do. And as one of my hospice patients would always remind me, we can’t just pray for ourselves we have to pray for everyone else God loves too. So God, we remember your children around the world today. Ease the suffering. Mend the broken hearts. Feed those who are hungry and comfort everyone who is scared. Strengthen those fighting for justice and increase our compassion for each other. Hear our prayer and the prayers of all who call to you. Amen.
Sometimes a fish jumps on the line even when you just want to enjoy not catching anything.Last night’s catch
When I left St. Giles Presbyterian Church over 5.5 years ago, I sorted through seven years of ministry in one place and narrowed it down to a few boxes of paper and many boxes of books. I am focusing today on the paper and not how many books I still have…although truth be told the number has decreased significantly. In the one of the boxes of files, I found calendars from each year I served a church. These calendars are made by the denomination and leave more room on Sundays as that is the busy day of the week in the church.
I took the calendars out of the box and sorted through the papers first. Most of the paper is being recycled as it is no longer something I need. The calendars stayed in their pile. Should I keep them? Why should I keep them? I opened the first one from 2004, and I was not prepared for the flood of emotions that came to me. I read of meetings with people I have not seen in years. I saw notes about preaching dates and education opportunities. I saw the way I used to write the letter R in the corner as a reminder for the weeks my then boyfriend was working. I saw notes about plays and sporting events and parties I attended for the youth who were a major part of my ministry. As I turned the pages, I got married, moved to a new state and church, bought a house, said good-bye to my best friend, watched my husband graduate, said good-bye to family members while welcoming others to the family. So many memories in these pages.
And then I was even more torn. Now that I know what is in those pages, do I keep them? Or is this blog post enough of a memory? Or better still should I hold on to the memories in my heart that have dulled the hurts over time and brightened the good moments?
Writing this has given me the courage to say good-bye to these calendars. I am thankful for these years of ministry and all that I experienced. I am thankful for the mentors and the supportive ones who guided me. I am working on being thankful for those who challenged me and made my work harder than it needed to be. I am thankful for the children and youth who are no longer children and youth and love hearing about the amazing adults they are. I am thankful for all those who volunteered countless hours to ensure each person who came through the doors knew they were loved. I am thankful for the ways I was welcomed into homes and lives of so many faithful people. And I ask forgiveness for the mistakes I made and the hurts I caused. My prayer is that all whose names are listed in those calendars and all who ministered along side me will know God’s peace and love today.
Holy Week has long been one of my favorite weeks of the year. As a pastor, I loved gathering at the table with the congregation on this Holy Thursday. I was reluctant to write a prayer for today as this day will not include gathering around the communion tables at our churches. And then I realized I need this prayer because things are different. I need a reminder that Jesus will be there at all our tables dining with us no matter where we are. So wherever this Maundy Thursday finds you know that you are not alone because Jesus is with you and we are all together in spirit as we join in this sacrament at our own tables.
Loving God, Eveything feels different today. We aren’t in our churches or Fellowship Hall gathered around the communion table ready to hear the familiar words and taste the bread and drink from the cup. We miss that time to gather. We miss that sacred time to be together. We miss being called to come to your table.
And yet, maybe this unique Thursday is another opportunity to meet Jesus. We can meet him at our tables for one or two or three or twelve. We can meet him in our homes with whatever food and drinks makes up tonight’s communion.
So we ask your blessing on this food and drink that it may be for us the body and the blood of Jesus. We ask your blessing on us that we may be Jesus for each of us and for those in need.
We come to our tables asking for forgiveness for those who we have wronged. We come to our tables with hearts heavy for those we will not see tonight-send your healing to all who are ill. Send your spirit of peace for all who are weary. Send your love to all who are lonely. Come, Holy Spirit, come and be with us tonight.
In remembrance of you and your love for us, Jesus, we gather around our tables tonight praying for the time when we can gather together again. Hear our prayer, Gracious God. Hear our prayer. Amen.
