The Holiday Season is hard. We are faced with so many expectations of what we should do. Pressure comes from all directions about how to have the perfect celebration. Add in grief and things get so much more challenging.
Sadly, this is my third Christmas without my Mom. I am writing this curled up under a blanket made of her shirts, drinking a cup of hot chocolate, and eating a peanut butter blossom cookie.
Our memories of loved ones come back to us in so many ways this time of year. I remember a loved one when I add an ornament to the tree that used to hang on their tree. I keep my grandparents’ Christmas tree that sheds more needles than a real tree because my grandfather’s handwriting is there telling me how to assemble it. And I think of my Mom when I bake peanut blossom cookies.
You see this is my Mom’s recipe. It is called Peanut Blossom Cookies. And it comes with the side note that the peanut butter is optional because Mom hates peanut butter cookies. This is such a perfect memory of my Mom. She was a picky eater. She would change recipes by leaving out what she didn’t like. For example, her version of apple salad or only turkey breast at Thanksgiving are famous and true stories in our family. And I would happily leave out the peanut butter to share a cookie with her. Since I cannot, I will stay under this blanket a little longer and give thanks for my Mom and all my loved ones who I miss especially this time of year.
Loving and Faithful God, At this beautiful and holy time of year, we are filled with a range of emotions. We joyfully prepare to welcome baby Jesus and our hearts ache as we miss people we love. We remember how it has been on Christmases past and know that we cannot recreate those memories. Send the Prince of Peace among us to provide the peace we need today. Send the Holy Spirit to be our comforter and companion. And bless all of us who are missing someone special this Christmas. Amen.
Thank you. Thank you for these words. My husband and his sister are moving their parents to assisted living near us (from 14 hours away) and they are doing it over Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. It’s stressful, of course, but also a time to grieve. They are grieving the home they spent time in as a family. They are grieving the independence that simply isn’t realistic anymore. They are grieving the loss of memories as dementia takes over. Your words are such a comfort. Thank you for being so open with your life experiences and sharing them in such an eloquent way! Merry Christmas, and may comfort and joy be yours.
Peace to you and your family, Shannon!