I remember when my buddy, Kristi, died. The grief was overwhelming. I cried and cried. Everywhere I turned something reminded me of her. I found ways to honor her memory including hanging up our picture and my husband making me a bench in the backyard so I could sit in nature and remember our stories.
Ten years have passed since her death. It doesn’t seem possible, and yet, it is. The memories still come and sometimes the tears too. What I feel now is often a sadness that for the things/people she didn’t get to meet that are important in my life and for our adventures not taken.
Yesterday as I was driving, I heard a song that made me smile. Kenny Chesney’s Happy on the Hey Now. He sings about a friend who died and his memories of this person. And then I heard him call her Kristi. And I thought I was imagining it. So I kept listening and turned it up. I heard Kristi again and again. When I was done driving, I looked it up and saw that the song is called Happy on the Hey Now (A Song for Kristi).
As I was listening to this song, I was smiling. I didn’t tear up although the next time I hear it I might. It isn’t the song I would have written for my Buddy, and I could still see her in this song too. The Kristi in the song loves to dance as did my dear friend. She lived her life in the moment which is something Kristi pushed me to do too.
“I hope time can be our healer, maybe time can be a friend. Still I’m a strong believer, someday we’ll see you again.”
For those of you grieving, my hope for you is moments like this where a good memory surprises you. You picture your loved one doing something they loved to do. You embrace whatever emotions come. And the grieving that was overwhelming is much less so. You love and miss your loved one and always will. And they live on in you and in all those who love them and keep their memories alive.
Or as Kenny sings, “And you will live with us as long as memories stay alive. And you left us with so many, Kristi, you will never die.”
Wow! thinking back and forth on this in my unending memories are my father and moth who passed on.
Surely they are not forgotten. Memories are fresh almost every minute that I will remember them. When I remember one the other one runs in and stand closer to the other in memory. Thanks for touching on the realities that we live with.
Oh, Buddy! I need to find this song. I am still finding myself grief-crying for her in the strangest of circumstances. Sending big old cyber hugs!!
I saw a memory on Facebook today where I was wearing socks and flip flops and it made me think of her. She is with us in so many stories and songs too!